I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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