MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
