hell yes lets make some ravioli
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Randomize