I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize