just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
