You surviving the open bar?
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i think my mom watched the whole time
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize