Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
then he tried to convert me to islam
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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