In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The struggles of a small town man whore
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
