i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
