I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
