Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize