so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
