white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
