Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
Randomize