I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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