From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
