so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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