Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just blew my weed a kiss
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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