I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Randomize