Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I just googled if crying burns calories
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
