I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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