I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
