1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize