Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
my liver is dry heaving
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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