I only kidnapped one of them. chill
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
