North Korea, Best Korea!
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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