i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
