I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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