i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
