I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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