Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
