he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
