I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize