You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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