yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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