So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
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