Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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