I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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