That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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