Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Randomize
