My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
