Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize
