Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
