why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
