8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize
