I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
