Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
