So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The air was thick with penises
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
This is classic penis vs brain.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
we're so committed to being not committed
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
Randomize
