real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
