; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
the raccoons are back...
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