Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
