so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
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