Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
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